revengeandretribution:

My muse is dead. Tell me how yours is dealing with it.

The veil of deceit lifts from his eyes as the dust settles around him. Distracted and confused, his gaze bounces around the landmarks surrounding them. All he can remember is… the war– no, not a war, but a battle. One he desperately had to win. Her life depended on it, but not just hers; the little one’s inside her. Everything he had ever done in his life had been to protect his family. He’d failed with his parents, letting them drive off that bridge that fated night. He’d failed with Jenna, not standing by her side at the damned ritual. He’d failed Alaric, not taking away the Gilbert ring before it claimed his soul. He’d failed with Elena, first at the bridge, and then at the wedding… not being there to stop Kai before he took his sister and Jo away from them.

But not Allison, never Allison.

He’d move mountains if it meant keeping her safe. He’d hold up the whole world on his shoulders if it meant sheltering his children away from the evil that stole his innocence. With Allison, they could face anything– defeat any demon that threatens their happiness. She is his strength, and his salvation. Being with her feels like he can do anything, be anyone, without the tether of his past. He can be more than the boy who couldn’t save his family.

Not even amnesia, forgetting every single little memory they had ever shared, could stop him from choosing Allison– from loving her. He’s proved it already. It’s the love of this one woman who brought him back from the brink and healed the wounds of their family. Every moment they had every shared is right back where it belongs, and it’s finally time to start over.

That’s just how powerful Allison is– he’s even beginning to remember that night, the night he left her to protect them. It’s coming back in pieces, little by little. He had originally thought it was a wolf, but no… that couldn’t be right. There’s something else, some piece of the puzzle missing.

There’s a deafening silence that falls over the forest, accompanied by a chill that he ignores. There’s something there, something he’s missing, and as he clenches his fist in concentration, his fingers curl around some kind of material. It’s saturated with some kind of sticky texture, and as he bears a grimace and attempts once more to clear his vision, his eyes fall to lap– to uncover the foreign object he retained from the war.

Color. There’s too much color.

It’s….. red? Red, red color– something red.

Blood. His own?

Yes.

No.

And as his fingers continue to tighten around her dilapidated flannel shirt, his heart continues to pound against the mental barrier, desperately trying to push through. His pupils are ragged– his breathing, shallow. There’s something there, if he can just knock this one wall down, he can be whole again. For her.

He has to.

---

He has to do this, for her. He cannot let them win. Because if they win, she dies, and that was never going to happen. He couldn’t let it. A snarl rips through his gritted teeth as he engages in this mental battle for control. A toothy grin sneers at him through the darkness. “You’re a tough one, Jeremy Gilbert. I’ll give you that. But guess what?” The toothy grin is closer now, and revealing elongated canines. “I’ve always liked a challenge.”

The punch connects square with his jaw, nearly knocking his head right off his shoulders. Blood and spittle fly through the air as his body crumbles into a heap. And while he debates which way to move, a boot to his chest kicks the breath out of his lung. He’s gasping, inhaling blood more than anything else, and he finds himself begging to die. Because dying wouldn’t stop this maniac, but at least he couldn’t use him as a tool for his destructive plans.

“Look at me, mate.” The voice is oddly calm, but not dissimilar to the vampire’s attitude the entire evening. “Mr. Gilbert…. Look. At Me.”

The last three words are laced with honey and persuasion, and he can feel them tickle the edges of his mind, urging him to give in.

“I’d. Rather. Die.” He spits back, weary hands trying and failing to gain traction on the muddy ground. He had to get up– he had to get out of there.

“Oh you will.” The chuckle that echoes in the night air sends a shiver down Jeremy’s spine. His body is yanked from the ground by the collar with little issue. The blood running from his nose has trickled into his right eye, distorting the world with a red lens. “–But not before you do something for me.”

---

He’s pulled back from his memory world by the sound of someone sobbing. It rattles his very soul, his whole body shaking almost violently listening to this distraught sound. Someone, somewhere, is screaming for his wife to wake up. Snotting and pleading and begging for forgiveness.

The blade falls from his fingers, tainted by her veins.

His throat closes, his body undeserving of life giving breath. His vision is spoiled by crimson as desperate hands smear blood over her face, in search of any reprieve from this nightmare. Apologies fall out of his mouth like silent waterfalls, his tears splattering unceremoniously on her tortured face.

“OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. WHAT HAVE I DONE?”

“ALLIE, BABY, PLEASE! PLEASE DON’T DO THIS. I NEVER MEANT FOR THIS TO HAPPEN. BABY PLEASE! PLEASE SAY SOMETHING!”

“DON’T LEAVE ME LIKE THIS!”

He’s choking on the very crumbling of his world as he pulls the woman he adores into his arms– as he pulls his lover and their baby inside her closer to him. The compulsion is gone, and he remembers every second spent fighting this eventuality. Worse still, he remembers every inch of his knife smoothly sliding between her ribs. She had been so surprised, and looked to him with such confusion. And that condemnation had remained on her corpse’s face, accusing even as he continues to regain his facilities.

There had never been anyone else but them in this clearing.

They were on their morning walk, the one they took together every day.

There was no one there to put them in danger.

No one, but him.

“I DIDN’T MEAN TO. I’M SORRY – JUST PLEASE, COME BACK.”

---

“I want you to kill Allison Argent.”